sometimes i have like really deep thoughts like the internet is fucking incredible man i can go on google and see like 10,000 dicks in an hour and like imagine back before the internet even, you couldn’t see that many dicks in a life time. I’ve seen more dicks this week than any Babylonian prostitute did in her entire life. Amazing.
once my baby was being really annoying so i put it in the basement but then i forgot and decided i didn’t want my basement anymore so i got rid of the door and then decided to do the rest later and when child protective services came they couldn’t get to my kid so they just wandered around my house
i’m talking about the sims please don’t call the police
money is so stupid and unnessecary we’re meat creatures on a rock floating in space and out entire lives are dominated by little bits of paper
what if tattoos just randomly appeared on our skin at key points in our lives and we had to figure out what they meant for ourselves
you mean like cutie marks in my little pony?
I am well aware. I’m faced with them everyday. I don’t need people reminding me about how much of a failure I am.
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Let’s take a moment to appreciate the fact Tony Stark killed a man over a Dora the Explorer watch.